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#451 yvonne johnson

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Posted 21 February 2010 - 04:29 PM

Little Britain's Press Conferences.

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#452 Evelyn

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Posted 23 February 2010 - 12:16 AM

QUOTE(Ron Johnson @ Feb 21 2010, 08:16 AM) View Post
Roger Federer is calling a news conference for later today. Apparently, he is a bad listener and forgot to take out the garbage twice last week. However, he acknowledges that he is a role model and must take account for this boorish behavior. Reports are that fiance will not be present, but that Roger will voluntarily enter an in-patient treatment facility for sensitivity training.

In other news, recent reports that Lebron James forgot Mother's Day are being strongly refuted by his publicist.


ron. if I wasn't worried it would start all kinds of rumorson MFF, I'd tell you I love you for that post ;-)


#453 Rich

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 03:52 PM

I got to thinking last night.

The Woodsman is currently residing in a Sex Rehab Clinic. Having never been invited to partake in one of these adventures, I find the theory of sex rehab generally confusing and therefore I require some questions be answered.

1. Does this clinic teach one not to have sex? If so does this mean The Woodsman will be eunuch-like? Wouldn't this be considered mental castration?

2. If The Woodsman simply doesn't want to have sex with anyone but his wife, the solution is simple and no reahb is necessary. Just give up all his finances and become broke - problem solved.

3. If the rehab is successful is The Woodsman still allowed to have sex with his wife? Or must he give it up entirely for the preservation of his marriage? - and thus enter the normal world.

4. Can you go to a Sex Rehab clinic to learn how to have sex?

5. Who invented Sex Rehab clinics?

6. What's the percentage of male/females in the clinic?

7. Are patients allowed to have sex with each other in order to wean themselves off sex slowly (like smokers)?

8. Is The Woodsman required to become a Buddist and give up all wordly pleasures?

9. And lastly - has the Dalai Lama visited The Woodsman to teach him the value of celibacy

#454 Carolyn Tillie

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 04:26 PM

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
1. Does this clinic teach one not to have sex? If so does this mean The Woodsman will be eunuch-like? Wouldn't this be considered mental castration?

No, the clinics do not teach abstinence.*

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
2. If The Woodsman simply doesn't want to have sex with anyone but his wife, the solution is simple and no rehab is necessary. Just give up all his finances and become broke - problem solved.

Even poor people have sexual addiction issues. Being rich does not make one a sex addict.

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
3. If the rehab is successful is The Woodsman still allowed to have sex with his wife? Or must he give it up entirely for the preservation of his marriage? - and thus enter the normal world.

Yes, he will still have relations with his wife. Rehab will teach him how not to want/have sex with people outside his marriage.

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
4. Can you go to a Sex Rehab clinic to learn how to have sex?

No.

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
5. Who invented Sex Rehab clinics?

They stem from other addiction centers, but most Sex Rehab clinics came directly from Porn Addiction centers which was often related to alcohol, drug, and food addiction clinics. IN THE 19th century, drug addiction, alcoholism, and other addictions were seen as a sign of akrasia—or a weakness of ones will. But after much scientific research into the brain made possible by technological advances in the late 20th century replaced this “psychosocial model” with the “disease model”.

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
6. What's the percentage of male/females in the clinic?

Historically, men outweigh women by about 80%.

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
7. Are patients allowed to have sex with each other in order to wean themselves off sex slowly (like smokers)?

No

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
8. Is The Woodsman required to become a Buddist and give up all wordly pleasures?

I have no idea.

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 07:52 AM) View Post
9. And lastly - has the Dalai Lama visited The Woodsman to teach him the value of celibacy.

Apparently, until yesterday the Dalai Lama didn't even know who Tiger was.



* A very good friend of mine operates a sex rehab clinic in San Diego. We've spoken at length about his practice so the information I have is second hand from a professional in the industry.

#455 hollywood

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 07:48 PM

I'm curious whether utensils play a role in sex rehab. If so, what sort?

Then that happened.

 

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#456 Carolyn Tillie

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 07:52 PM

QUOTE(hollywood @ Feb 24 2010, 11:48 AM) View Post
I'm curious whether utensils play a role in sex rehab. If so, what sort?


ninja.gif Most definitely. ninja.gif

#457 Rich

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 08:10 PM

I need to enter posting rehab.

#458 SethG

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 08:16 PM

Does the Motion Plus attachment make a big difference in performance?


(This is the place for our questions regarding Tiger Woods Golf 2010 on the Wii, right?)
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#459 Sneakeater

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 08:21 PM

QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 03:52 PM) View Post
2. If The Woodsman simply doesn't want to have sex with anyone but his wife, the solution is simple and no reahb is necessary. Just give up all his finances and become broke - problem solved.


I do not think this will lead to his having sex with his wife.
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#460 splinky

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 08:22 PM

QUOTE(SethG @ Feb 24 2010, 03:16 PM) View Post
Does the Motion Plus attachment make a big difference in performance?


(This is the place for our questions regarding Tiger Woods Golf 2010 on the Wii, right?)

the main thing is to keep the controller pointed straight down as you start your swing, do not push the a button too early in your swing and yes, the motion plus attachments helps a lot and always, always wear a condom. remember kids, hope is not a method

“One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. 'Oh, no!', I said, 'Disneyland burned down.' He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.”
~Jack Handey

*proud descendant of cheese eating surrender monkeys*

 


#461 Rich

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 08:34 PM

QUOTE(Sneakeater @ Feb 24 2010, 03:21 PM) View Post
QUOTE(Rich @ Feb 24 2010, 03:52 PM) View Post
2. If The Woodsman simply doesn't want to have sex with anyone but his wife, the solution is simple and no reahb is necessary. Just give up all his finances and become broke - problem solved.


I do not think this will lead to his having sex with his wife.

True, but while poor men don't have sex with their wives, other women won't even look at them - so at least half the battle is won.

#462 Rich

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Posted 24 February 2010 - 08:35 PM

QUOTE(splinky @ Feb 24 2010, 03:22 PM) View Post
the motion plus attachments helps a lot and always, always wear a condom. remember kids, hope is not a method

The Woodsman Cometh

#463 Rail Paul

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Posted 25 February 2010 - 02:23 PM


The New York Times consults several experts on sex addiction treatment.

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#464 splinky

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 09:36 PM

can this be old news yet?
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“One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. 'Oh, no!', I said, 'Disneyland burned down.' He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.”
~Jack Handey

*proud descendant of cheese eating surrender monkeys*

 


#465 Carolyn Tillie

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Posted 17 March 2010 - 02:12 PM

He's baaaaaaaaaaaaaccckkkk......

To appear next month at the Masters.