5552 replies to this topic

[hollywood]

The French are so rude because they resent the benefits brought to them by the end of the second world war. Their sneering ways are a simple reverse snobberie, which actually translates as I would like to fellate any passing anglophone but I am just too proud to admit this.

Wait till the Mrs. hears about this.

[Adam]

Is there a place in London were I can get real Italian?

[Adam]

Hi, I'm visiting Scotland for five days and I am really interested in Culture and History. I am Scottish by the way, as my grandmothers paternal great-grandfather came from Cork. Haggis doesn't really contain lungs and such does it? Thanx.

[StephenT]

Hi, I'm visiting Scotland for five days and I am really interested in Culture and History. I am Scottish by the way, as my grandmothers paternal great-grandfather came from Cork. Haggis doesn't really contain lungs and such does it? Thanx.

PS Which is the best Single Malt Scotch?

[Slapsie Maxie]

I am told, if I wear Burberry, I will really blend in with the locals.

[jinmyo]

Which fork should I use? Thanks.

[GavinJones]

your own fork is generally to be preferred, though on occasion a neighbour's will do.
Under what circumstances should I use fish knives?

[Slapsie Maxie]

This is a genuine question someone once asked me as I walked north across Westminster Bridge.

pointing at the HoC, they said "excuse me, is that Oxford or Cambridge?"

Also, when I worked in a bookstore, I had some great questions asked.

person holding a copy of Les Miserables " do you have a thinner one?"

Person pointing to some stairs in Liberty's " do those stairs go down?"

S

[Adam]

Overheard at Endinburgh castle; "Wow, you can see France from here!". Nope, that would be Fife, the wet bit is the Forth of Fife, not the English Channel, which is South of here.

Overheard in Italy; "Do you have any local champagne?". When offered Prosecco; "No, I mean do you have any locally made Champagne", the last spoke very slowly with great force, as Italians are obviously simple folk and hard of understanding. I was very helpful and pointed out the champagne was made in Champagne, which was in France, not Italy.

[Slapsie Maxie]

which was in France, not Italy.

Is this the France that one can see from the castle in Edinburgh

[Adam]

which was in France, not Italy.

Is this the France that one can see from the castle in Edinburgh

The same. France is best visited in a different country apparantly.

[Slapsie Maxie]

my fave such story is actually rather sweet and was reported quite widely last year

An elderly American ex GI came to London to re-visit for the first time in 50 odd years since he had been stationed in London and Edinburgh during the war.

After a few days in the capital he wanted to head to Edinburgh to see old haunts. He recalled being shipped up there on the Great Northern Line railway, so mistakenly got on The Northern line tube. He recalled getting off at the end of the line, so got off at the end of the line and spent three days in a hotel in Edgeware looking for the Castle.

the nice denoument of the story is that staff at the hotel in Edgeware suddenly clicked what was going on. They owned a hotel in Edinburgh and arranged for him to be driven to Edinburgh, put up at their hotel and be made a fuss of by local press etc etc all at their expense

I rather liked that

S

[Adam]

What a fantastic scam! That is, like so 'Dirty, Rotten Scoundrels'.

[jinmyo]

I'm getting so tired of chicken. Can I order something that tastes like chicken but isn't so white? Thanks.

[jinmyo]

How do I access the interweb? Thanks.