SethG

Convivium Osteria. Kind of a bummer. While they weren’t destination dining they were one of the best take-visiting-guests-to places in the Slope. Always reliable and cozy.

Caputo’s Bake Shop Not a rent issue, they own the building. Word on the street is that they needed some expensive work done to bring the place up to code, and since none of the current kids or grand-kids wanted to take it over down the road, John Caputo just decided it wasn’t worth it and to close down. Odd to do it so abruptly, without any community send-off. But it is what it is. We still got Mazzola. Well, for now at least.

I think you’re right - they were 4 oz bars. Which makes the prices even more insane. I’ll have to check, I have a couple stashed in the freezer. Formaggio was my go-to for fancy butters before, now I’m back to them again.

Yeah, I regularly went for the Bordier - when it was available… which was inconsistent. And if I could find it, which was also inconsistent since it moved locations regularly. But sometime last year it was restocked and the bars (8oz) had gone up to $21! That was a hard no. It’s great but… when it costs more pound for pound than the steak you’d melt it on or the lobster you’d dip into it, something has gone awry. Chalked it up to tariffs. I saw a recent post on Reddit that some of the flavored bars hit *$40*. Yowch. “Culinary Theater…” Well, that explains a lot. It sounds like it was created in a bubble by a circle jerk of rich dudes complimenting each other on how brilliant they are. Thinking about it, it was basically the $100M version of that crazy fruit stand / laissez-faire art project in the Market Line.

Hardly shocking. The retail half was terribly designed and terribly (barely?) managed, a dud practically from the start. And the restaurants didn’t really seem to be bringing people in on the weekdays. Last time I was there I *tried* to spend money but couldn’t. Someone stationed behind the meat counter told me I’d have to come back in half an hour for a chuck roast that was already sitting there, the size I wanted, needing no additional work. The butcher was on break. They tried to get some help for me from the fishmonger but apparently they were incapable of weighing and tagging mammalian meat. I walked through the upstairs, they were trying to woo people into the Red Pearl with drag karaoke. The shelves in the little “Asian” market were like playing expired product roulette. It does feel like the whole seaport is just not happening. Multiple failures now (Momofuku, Malibu Farm, now this) - have to wonder who’s next. Anyway, surprised they didn’t have a GOBO sale to clear out the last of the product. For some reason I find it kind of funny that it’s basically being replaced with… air.

We've been a few times since they opened. Just there last night, actually. Fun vibe, pleasant unpretentious staff. The cheesecake is dynamite. The wine list is well-curated, Only complaint is unless they install a vestibule or something I won't sit at the bar in the winter months again. I can do without the rush of frigid air every thirty seconds when someone opens the door. Our once-hot plates literally felt like they'd come out of a refrigerator after a few blasts. Have not tried the famous "stink-burger" yet but it has me curious. Maybe next time.

To be fair, it’s walking distance from the PATH, and no more a schlep than Flushing. And when I’m out that way for dinner there’s a decent chance it’s at some BYOB place and I’m coming home after 11 so… works for me, at least. (Still doubt I’ll ever get around to going, given the limited schedule)

I got the idea behind the tortellini… I’ve seen squash and sweet potato stuffed pastas with amaretto on multiple menus. It’s a thing, though the origin I’ve no idea. Never caught my interest. Tried it once at The Orchard (“The Orange Submarine”) when a date ordered it… too desserty for me. So, doing a more savory take on it, sure… but it still didn’t work for me. Meaty desserty. And I’m not inherently against cookies or other sweet elements in savory dishes. They are small, though. Like I get they’re not meant to be main courses but some were barely more than a few bites.

Mission / Bowein has been one of the most inconsistent dining experiences for me. The highs have been very high…but other nights the same dishes would be drastically under-seasoned or inedibly over-salted, seemingly at random. During the Dimayuga era on East Broadway it seemed to be the most consistent. Curious about the latest iteration, though I think I’m more excited about the new Hakata Tonton next door.

Returned yesterday for an early dinner. Assorted mezze (of course), some turmeric-stained cauliflower, lamb brains, rabbit, and a few glasses of wine. The secret to his rabbit, he confided, was that he just cooks it in the same pan simultaneously with his duck, so it winds up covered in duck fat. I don’t know what the secret to the lamb brains is, since it looks like he’s just hammering them in a hot skillet yet they come out better than any brains I’ve had anywhere. Once again we were the only patrons, a couple of late lunch diners leaving as we sat down. Free-wheeling conversation ensued, covering everything from business (not good, lately) to the economy to his sister’s recent visit / kitchen takeover (the best chef of the siblings, he insists) to Noguchi (“He should be made the Saint of Queens”) to French brain cookery (not a fan) to Catherine of Medici, to some of his favorite things around the borough - foods (Taiwanese “fly heads” in Elmhurst) and bars (LetLove Inn for music, Irish Whiskey Bar for… well, Irish whiskey) and museums (Louis Armstrong House) - to the Gaza protests (I won’t repeat his opinions here, ha…) i don’t think he ever plans on retiring. I’m not sure he could. But there’s that mono no aware in the air with every visit, an acute sense of the inevitable impermanence of this.

We go a couple times a year. There was a period after the revelations about Batali surfaced but before his divestment that we didn’t go, though. After he sold his share I got a text from a friend, “is it ok to get the tripe again?” - so of course we did. The room was quite sparse, though admittedly we had a late post-movie reservation. During the pandemic they had one of the better games going. And it seemed like people picked up on it, as it got busier each time we went. And post-pandemic it just stayed busy. Not impossible-rez busy like in their early days, but there’s been a reasonably full house every time we’ve been since. The crowd has gotten a little older… but then so have I.

We went early on and I decided not to post about it. Honestly, the only thing I remembered about the meal was the champagne (which was extraordinary, and actually priced below any retail I could find) and… literally nothing else. Until just now, when I was reminded of the leeks. The execution was perfect nothing was bad. Nothing was interesting or memorable, though. (OTOH, we just had our first post-Kent meal at Saga the other night. While maybe not perfect, it’s in good hands.)

We enjoyed Bridges overall. We managed to snag a rez early on-ish (it was around Halloween) - I hadn’t really seen any press yet, it was just this new place that popped up on Resy and seemed to be inexplicably booked solid from day one. The website had no menu at the time, just an address and a link to an Instagram page But I found a menu someone had posted online, looked interesting so when a Notify hit I grabbed it. So the wine list is certainly… (annoyingly?) esoteric. Gringet… Manseng… Valdiguie… Marechal Foch… look at us with our atypical list. Is a “gringet” even a grape? I dunno, it could be an apple? Or a fish? Wasn’t Marechal Foch a Star Wars prequel character? My general experience with uncommon varietals is finding there’s a reason they’re not more common. Over here there’s a wine from North Carolina. Here’s a Mexican wine. There’s one from Vermont that costs three digits. I’m distrustful. Anyway… I give the somm a price point and she gets us a decent wine that has an even better story behind it. Vineyard burnt down, yada yada, okay fine we’ll get that one. As to the food…. The lime-leaf Béarnaise with the crab, agreed, leaned a bit salty. But the crab itself was fine, if the portion could’ve been a little bigger. Tête de cochon was excellent. Uni custard also very good Eel dumplings were fine, but it almost could’ve been anything in there for all the eel one could taste The advertised horseradish was hard to detect. Not a re-order Our sweetbreads weren’t burnt. Well done, if not as creative as some of the other options. Could’ve used a little more acidity somewhere. Cocktails we tried were kind of meh. A gimlet was aggressively limey Some concoction that involved tequila and what I’m sure was Kadoya toasted sesame oil didn’t quite click for me. Would I go through the reservation rigmarole again? I dunno. Would I go as a walk in to the seemingly not-as-busy bar area? Sure.

Oddly we had been thinking about getting takeout from Yong Chuan tonight, so I took that as a sign. I had been slightly wary of them, due to the presence of “Jinhua Ham” on the menu. Jinhua Ham is illegal in the US, and I doubt they’re secretly importing it and advertising an illegal product openly. So it’s obviously some other country ham they’re passing off as Jinhua… it could even be something good, like Lady Edison’s “Jinhua-style” ham (probably not) - but that’s a pet peeve of mine. A silly peeve, perhaps. Fine. Anyway, that aside… dinner comes in a nice reusable foil-lined bag: The order: seafood noodles, stir-fried eel, Ningbo pork patty, and a shockingly priced ($32 for a small) duck and bamboo shoot soup with aforementioned “Jinhua” ham. You may notice I listed four dishes but there are five in the picture. That’s because the “small” soup took up two giant bowls and contained half a duck. So I guess the price tag made sense. i really liked the noodles, there was a rich nuttiness to the oil that slicked it. Reminded me of when I make homemade XO sauce with Serrano ham. Fat from that “Jinhua” ham? Maybe. Eel was very good. Well-balanced bright flavors, good counterpart to the meaty protein Soup was okay. Very mild. There’s still some in the fridge. It’ll make an okay lunch with some rice tomorrow. Not a re-order though. If you unrobed twenty uncooked pork dumplings from Vanessa’s and mashed the filling together you’d have the Ningbo pork patty. Well, with an egg on it you would. I mean, it’s fine. Just not terribly exciting. And a bit much, unless you’re sharing it four+ ways.

Stretch Pizza I was a little torn on. Like, the pizza is fine...? Some clever flavor combos. There's a bit of a "2AM stoner fridge raid" vibe now and then, but that can still be good. Some of the side dishes I found duds. There are a couple likeable ones (like the chickpea fries) that have brief flashes of the old Wylie, but overall there's not much whiz-bang to a meal there. I think at this point, many of those techniques and chemicals and whatnot that Wylie, Heston, etc were playing with... a lot have become more commonplace. They're just in the background of many dishes at many restaurants, no longer the point. So you don't see the work so much, even though it's there. Honestly, right now, in terms of interesting modernist food manipulation that really shows -and that I've been to - my first thought is EMP. There's also the Jose Andres Bazaar (which I haven't been to) that I imagine will sate any desire for clarified scallop snow and goat cheese balloons. Cafe Mars for sure has me curious, though. It looks like silly fun.