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The surrealism of everyday life


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We have threads for annoyances and what made us cheerful, but then there's those weird things that happen.....   My workplace is particularly fertile ground for the surreal. 2 current examples:

Yeah, me too.   As soon as I'm a real member, I'll upload a real avatar.   Or did you mean my sig?

You talkin' to me?

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My apartment windows look out on the very large interior garden (roughly an acre) of the complex. When sitting at the table in the living room or standing at the kitchen counter one inevitably sees into windows across the way. Recently a new tenant moved into the apartment with windows directly across from mine. This guy appears to spend every moment he is home walking around in nothing but his undershorts--he seems to favor blue boxers. A couple of visitors to my place have actually remarked on it--the fellow spends a lot of time walking around the living room and kitchen with the lights ablaze and he has nothing on the windows.

 

He's pretty easy on the eyes, but you know what? I'm tired of looking at him. Put some clothes on!

 

Keep an eye out for Raymond Burr.

 

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Our neighbors have a really pervy-looking, inflatable, animated, light-up Winnie the Pooh and Tigger Christmas decoration in their front yard. Here is a picture to give you an idea:

Tigger Getting Extra-Friendly Service From His Pal

Has anyone else seen this display when Pooh is moving up-and-down, in-and-out of the honey pot and thought "WTF?!" Reminded me a little of Hallmark's "Piglet's First Ride" ornament...

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Our neighbors have a really pervy-looking, inflatable, animated, light-up Winnie the Pooh and Tigger Christmas decoration in their front yard. Here is a picture to give you an idea:

Tigger Getting Extra-Friendly Service From His Pal

Has anyone else seen this display when Pooh is moving up-and-down, in-and-out of the honey pot and thought "WTF?!" Reminded me a little of Hallmark's "Piglet's First Ride" ornament...

self inflating and comes with its own tethers. ;) doesn't get much better than that. simply screams holiday, to me. :D

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Last night on CBC Radio I heard an interview with a Canadian National (CN) Rail executive who was protesting that American interests were not taking over CN. Perhaps not the best choice of spokeman for this issue, as he had a Southern accent thick enough to cut with a knife.

 

 

Memphis, you win the prize.

 

Hunter Harrison, the CEO, is from the Illinois Central Railroad. He started work in 1963 as a part time oiler for a railroad that eventually became part of the IC. Literally worked his way from the lowest job in the industry to one of the highest.

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self inflating and comes with its own tethers. ;) doesn't get much better than that. simply screams holiday, to me. :D

 

hahahaha.

 

You really have to see it animated to get the full effect. Tigger looks like he is totally stoked to be receiving special "woodland" services from his buddy.

 

Maybe Santa will bring me one since I’ve been naughty.

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(Apologies for All Caps, but I copied and pasted from the NOAA site)

 

The last time we had a forecast like this (Feb. 06), a gust of 124 mph was clocked on top of Stratton Mountain (about 10 miles from here) and the whole main power trunk that runs up and over another nearby ridge went down, leaving whole towns without power for days while crews worked deep in the woods (and through the night) to repair the lines. There wasn't much snow that year; right now, there's 2 - 3 feet in many spots. Here's hoping we're spared, or those guys are going to have a pretty fucked up holiday (regardless of how much overtime they're earning). The power crews are major heroes around here.

 

Should be an interesting 24 hours. We're not on a peak, but we're right on the West River – with a narrow valley that funnels wind like crazy. It's eerily still right now, but I'm headed out to batten down the hatches.

 

Emphasis mine (the last one because the thought of giant inflated Santas stuck high in trees or in other inappropriate spots is fairly amusing):

A HIGH WIND WARNING REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 6 AM EST MONDAY FOR

ALL OF EASTERN NEW YORK AND ADJACENT WESTERN NEW ENGLAND.

 

SOUTH TO SOUTHEAST WINDS WILL INCREASE SIGNIFICANTLY AHEAD OF A

POWERFUL COLD FRONT THAT WILL SWEEP THROUGH THE REGION THIS EVENING

STRONG TO DAMAGING WINDS ARE EXPECTED TO OCCUR...FIRST WITH SOUTH

TO SOUTHEAST WINDS AHEAD OF THE COLD FRONT FROM LATER THIS MORNING

INTO EARLY THIS EVENING...THEN WITH WEST TO SOUTHWEST WINDS

BEHIND THE COLD FRONT LATE THIS EVENING.

 

WINDS WILL VARY FROM THE RIVER VALLEYS TO THE HIGHER TERRAIN. THE

STRONGEST WINDS WILL BE ACROSS THE PEAKS OF THE CATSKILLS...

ADIRONDACKS...SOUTHERN GREEN MOUNTAINS...BERKSHIRES...TACONICS AND

LITCHFIELD HILLS. SUSTAINED WINDS OF 30 TO 50 MPH WILL BE

LIKELY...ESPECIALLY IN THE AFTERNOON AND EVENING...WITH GUSTS 60

TO 75 MPH. SOME HIGHER PEAKS COULD EXPERIENCE WIND GUSTS UP TO 90

MPH.

 

IN VALLEY LOCATIONS...SUSTAINED WINDS WILL BE 20 TO 30 MPH...WITH

OCCASIONAL WIND GUSTS AROUND 60 MPH...ESPECIALLY IN THE AFTERNOON

AND EVENING WHEN OCCASIONAL HEAVY RAIN COULD HELP MIX DOWN THE

DAMAGING WIND GUSTS. SOME FUNNELING AND CHANNELING OF WINDS MAY

ENHANCE WIND GUSTS OVER 60 MPH IN NORTH SOUTH ORIENTED VALLEYS

SUCH AS THE HUDSON VALLEY...HOUSATONIC VALLEY...DEERFIELD VALLEY AND

CONNECTICUT VALLEY...AS WELL AS ACROSS ANY HIGHER TERRAIN ABOVE

THE VALLEY FLOOR WHICH HAS A SOUTH OR SOUTHEAST ASPECT.

 

THE AREAS MOST SUSCEPTIBLE TO THE DAMAGING WINDS CAN EXPECT TO

HAVE DOWNED TREES...LARGE TREE LIMBS...POWER LINES AND EVEN

UTILITY POLES. HIGH PROFILE VEHICLES WILL BE VULNERABLE TO THE

WINDS AND SUBJECT TO FLIPPING OVER ESPECIALLY ON ELEVATED BRIDGES

AND ACROSS HIGHER TERRAIN.

 

TRAINED SPOTTERS SHOULD REPORT DAMAGING WINDS INCLUDING DOWNED

TREES...LARGE LIMBS AND POWER LINES...AS WELL AS STRUCTURAL DAMAGE

AND MEASURED WIND GUSTS OF 40 MPH OR MORE TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER

SERVICE VIA THE SEVERE WEATHER REPORT FORM ON THE INTERNET OR BY

TELEPHONE. THE GENERAL PUBLIC SHOULD REPORT WIND DAMAGE AND MEASURED

WIND GUSTS OF 40 MPH OR MORE TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE BY

EMAIL AT ALB.STORMREPORT@NOAA.GOV.

 

A HIGH WIND WARNING MEANS A HAZARDOUS HIGH WIND EVENT IS EXPECTED

OR OCCURRING. SUSTAINED WIND SPEEDS OF AT LEAST 40 MPH OR GUSTS OF

58 MPH OR MORE CAN LEAD TO PROPERTY DAMAGE. ANY LOOSE DEBRIS...

INCLUDING HOLIDAY DECORATIONS...COULD BE BLOWN SIGNIFICANT

DISTANCES.

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I hesitate to admit this because I fear that you all will shun me from now on but -

 

I was in an Olive Garden last night. It IS incredibly surreal - the faux patio-dining decor, the constant efforts to upsell at every step, the Humpty Dumpty shapes of a substantial minority of the patrons - you feel like you've slipped into an alternate reality for a spell, similar to the one we live in but everything seems just a little out of phase.

 

Why was I there? One of the two places (excluding McD's BK Wendy's etc.) here in Augusta Maine that is open after 10:00 on a Saturday night. It's an early-bed-early-rise culture up here.

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I hesitate to admit this because I fear that you all will shun me from now on but -

 

I was in an Olive Garden last night. It IS incredibly surreal - the faux patio-dining decor, the constant efforts to upsell at every step, the Humpty Dumpty shapes of a substantial minority of the patrons - you feel like you've slipped into an alternate reality for a spell, similar to the one we live in but everything seems just a little out of phase.

 

Why was I there? One of the two places (excluding McD's BK Wendy's etc.) here in Augusta Maine that is open after 10:00 on a Saturday night. It's an early-bed-early-rise culture up here.

How were the breadsticks?

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I hesitate to admit this because I fear that you all will shun me from now on but -

It happens. You are a survivor.

I may have told this story. Sorry. My well is only so deep.

We were in Rome and a friend's brother and new sister in law were visiting. The woman was very irritating. A born again at the Vatican is not a pretty thing. Anyway, we were tired and ready to eat and passed a dump I knew would be horrible but this sister in law insisted she was too tired to move any further and we had to eat there. We told her to only order a simple pasta but she was tired and bitchy and knew better. She of course ordered lasagne al forno. So we ate, it was bad and later in the meal I see her writing postcards to friends back home and I see her write, "The food in Italy is ok. I make better lasagne." I imagine she is a good Olive Garden patron and tells people the food is better than you can get in Italy!

 

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I hesitate to admit this because I fear that you all will shun me from now on but -

It happens. You are a survivor.

I may have told this story. Sorry. My well is only so deep.

We were in Rome and a friend's brother and new sister in law were visiting. The woman was very irritating. A born again at the Vatican is not a pretty thing. Anyway, we were tired and ready to eat and passed a dump I knew would be horrible but this sister in law insisted she was too tired to move any further and we had to eat there. We told her to only order a simple pasta but she was tired and bitchy and knew better. She of course ordered lasagne al forno. So we ate, it was bad and later in the meal I see her writing postcards to friends back home and I see her write, "The food in Italy is ok. I make better lasagne." I imagine she is a good Olive Garden patron and tells people the food is better than you can get in Italy!

My cousin tells a similar story. She was in the airport waiting for a connecting flight to Bari and struck up a conversation with a GI stationed in Italy. At some point the guy started complaining about the food and how it's so much better at Olive Garden. Needless to say, she was appalled.

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GG: Yikes! Tuck up tight and hunker down!

 

Ghostrider: Don't worry, I'm an Olive Garden survivor, too. All we can do is try to forget and hope it never happens again.

 

And be glad it wasn't Applebees.

 

Still calm as can be here. Probably blow in like a low-flying 747. That's what it did last time: 0 – 80 mph in a flash. I happened to be getting gas at the time; it was the initial gust that took down the main power trunk & when it happened, the power junction box across the street blew. Tell me how thrilled you'd be if you had a gas hose stuck in your car and there was a lightning-capacity power surge arcing yellow-purple about 20 yards away.

 

I managed not to soil myself.

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